I move out tomorrow. Hnn. Excited, nervous, sad and a few other emotions all at once. I'm really leaving home. I wonder if I'm really ready. I guess there's that part of me that's really just terrified I'll fall flat on my face. That I won't be able to cope, that'll be too hard to do. So many little nagging doubts clouding my brain. I'm trying not to give them much attention, but it's a little hard.
I've been in a complete manic phase for two days now, only able to get like four hours of sleep at a time. Not that any of it was good sleep, hnn. At least other things got done, things were sorted, and some fun rp plans were made, so that's always good, I suppose.
Alot of worry about other things too. About finances, classes, my grandma (what is she going to do without me? She does honestly depend on me for alot. I can't help but feel like I'm abandoning her), my friends, a certain someone who's been sick far too much lately for my taste. Worry worry worry. I'm such a fucking girl sometime, I swear to God.
And yet, I can't let that worry override and paralyze me like it often does. I want to take this chance and opportunity to get the best experience I can out of things. Things will happen or they won't, and worrying about them until I feel physically sick isn't going to change the outcome, so there's no point in doing so, really.
Hmm. Shower time, then I pack more. I need to disconnect the Wii and pack it as well.
But first? I finish this round of Peggle. Oh yes.
Song of the entry:
( Only Got One by Frou Frou )
I've been in a complete manic phase for two days now, only able to get like four hours of sleep at a time. Not that any of it was good sleep, hnn. At least other things got done, things were sorted, and some fun rp plans were made, so that's always good, I suppose.
Alot of worry about other things too. About finances, classes, my grandma (what is she going to do without me? She does honestly depend on me for alot. I can't help but feel like I'm abandoning her), my friends, a certain someone who's been sick far too much lately for my taste. Worry worry worry. I'm such a fucking girl sometime, I swear to God.
And yet, I can't let that worry override and paralyze me like it often does. I want to take this chance and opportunity to get the best experience I can out of things. Things will happen or they won't, and worrying about them until I feel physically sick isn't going to change the outcome, so there's no point in doing so, really.
Hmm. Shower time, then I pack more. I need to disconnect the Wii and pack it as well.
But first? I finish this round of Peggle. Oh yes.
Song of the entry:
( Only Got One by Frou Frou )