That I Would Be Good Even When I'm Overwhelmed

[desertions]

Gah, it's 1:09 am, and I still am not sleepy
This does not bode well
Then again, I never sleep well anymore
Too stressed out
Too much pressure from everyone
I can't be perfect damnit
I do not get good grades, I can't get scholarships
I am not athletic, I can't earn anything with that
I am not artistic or particulary good at anything
I am just trying the best I can and it's simply not good enough
I am not a great child, I am barely a good one
But I am trying the hardest I can
And trying to live up to all these expectations is really, fucking hard
I wish they could just love me for who I am
And all my flaws
Cause I have alot of them
I'm pretty fucked up
But I am trying really fucking hard
And shouldn't that count for something

In other notes, if you haven't done the "Suprise Katie with a cell phone messege!" thing yet, check my last entry and do so, cause right now, I could really use some cheering up

Song of The Entry:

That I Would Be Good by Alanis Morriesette

That I would be good even if I did nothing
That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
That I would be good if I got and stayed sick
That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

That I would be fine even if I went bankrupt
That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
That I would be great if I was no longer queen
That I would be grand if I was not all knowing

That I would be loved even when I numb myself
That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
That I would be loved even when I was fuming
That I would be good even if I was clingy

That I would be good even if I lost sanity
That I would be good
Whether with or without you