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June 2 rears it's ugly head once more
I should explain I suppose
I hate this day because it's the anniversy of my grandfather's death, he died three years ago
Because I lived with my grandparents, he was probably the closest thing I had to a father..
I was extremely close to him, probably the only one I ever felt comfortable talking to or crying in front of...
and when me and my grandma would fight, he always took my side, even when I was wrong..
He used to do things for me alot, buying me stuff and taking me places, pretty much anything to cheer me up..
Which is probably why his death messed me up so much...
after he died I just slept alot, didn't talk to people much, pulled away from my friends,
I didn't want to deal with people, not real ones, they could leave, they could die.
That's when I really immeresed myself into rping and online stuff...
I just wanted to be anywhere and in any situtation then the one I had..
I barely even talked, if I wasn't online, I was usually asleep,
I didn't want to be awake, it wasn't worth it.
And everyone thought I was handling it so well, because I didn't show it..
It was about six monthes after that that I had my suicide attempt...
I was just so tired, you know?
People didn't like me, they died, they left, they didn't care, it just got too hard..
Espically cause I tried to repress it so much...
Which only made it worse....
I miss him so much, I'm almost crying right now, I want him to hold me, tell me everything's going to be okay again
Hell, I want anyone to do that...
Calls would be appriciated today, it's going to be a rough one. Not asking for sympathy, I could probably just use someone to listen to
I'm Sure The View From Heaven
Beats The Hell Out Of Mine Here
And If We All Believe In Heaven
Maybe We'll Make It Through One More Year
I Hope That All Is Well In Heaven
Cause It's All Shot To Hell Down Here
I Hope That I Find You In Heaven
Cause I'm So Lost Without You Down Here
You Won't Be Coming Back
And I Didn't Get To Say Goodbye...
I should explain I suppose
I hate this day because it's the anniversy of my grandfather's death, he died three years ago
Because I lived with my grandparents, he was probably the closest thing I had to a father..
I was extremely close to him, probably the only one I ever felt comfortable talking to or crying in front of...
and when me and my grandma would fight, he always took my side, even when I was wrong..
He used to do things for me alot, buying me stuff and taking me places, pretty much anything to cheer me up..
Which is probably why his death messed me up so much...
after he died I just slept alot, didn't talk to people much, pulled away from my friends,
I didn't want to deal with people, not real ones, they could leave, they could die.
That's when I really immeresed myself into rping and online stuff...
I just wanted to be anywhere and in any situtation then the one I had..
I barely even talked, if I wasn't online, I was usually asleep,
I didn't want to be awake, it wasn't worth it.
And everyone thought I was handling it so well, because I didn't show it..
It was about six monthes after that that I had my suicide attempt...
I was just so tired, you know?
People didn't like me, they died, they left, they didn't care, it just got too hard..
Espically cause I tried to repress it so much...
Which only made it worse....
I miss him so much, I'm almost crying right now, I want him to hold me, tell me everything's going to be okay again
Hell, I want anyone to do that...
Calls would be appriciated today, it's going to be a rough one. Not asking for sympathy, I could probably just use someone to listen to
I'm Sure The View From Heaven
Beats The Hell Out Of Mine Here
And If We All Believe In Heaven
Maybe We'll Make It Through One More Year
I Hope That All Is Well In Heaven
Cause It's All Shot To Hell Down Here
I Hope That I Find You In Heaven
Cause I'm So Lost Without You Down Here
You Won't Be Coming Back
And I Didn't Get To Say Goodbye...
