I Do Not Want This........

So I went to Borders,
to use the gift card Chrissy gave me for my bday...
Anyways I bought the "Downward Spiral" CD by Nine Inch Nails
and on it i found a song that describes how I feel about my depression and stuff...


I do not want this- by Nine Inch Nails

i'm losing ground
you know how this world can beat you down
i'm made of clay
i fear i'm the only one who thinks this way
i'm always falling down the same hill
bamboo puncturing this skin
and nothing comes bleeding out of me just like a waterfall i'm
drowning in
2 feet below the surface i can still make out your wavy face
and if i could just reach you maybe i could leave this place
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i stay inside my bed
i have lived so many lives all in my head
don't tell me that you care
there really isn't anything, is there?
you would know, wouldn't you?
you extend your hand to those who suffer
to those who know what it really feels like
to those who've had a taste
like that means something
and oh so sick i am
and maybe i don't have a choice
and maybe that is all i have
and maybe this is a cry for help
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters


It's so good...
then again NIN is a -great- band
it bothers me that many only think of the song "Closer"
Which is a great song, but they have much deeper stuff...
Like this song, or hurt, or mr self destruct, or even deeper...

Anyways, I can relate to this, because I often feel sucked in by this, and people act like I want it,
I don't
and they have no right to tell me how they feel
cause they have no clue