Somehow Doubt We'll Ever Be The Same
Dec. 1st, 2008 11:24 pmTired, and after no sleep last night and the super temper rage that preceded the no sleep, perhaps I should head off to bed soon. At least I've been able to touch base with a few people and smooth things over. Or something. I dunno.
Two finals this week. Hello there anxiety, cause you weren't strong enough right now.
Bleh, have a meme.
1. Put your music player on shuffle
2. The first lines of twenty songs = a poem; the first line of the twenty-first song is the title.
I'm Losing My Hair and My Vision is Shady
I think it's getting to the point where I can be myself again
You're a part time lover and a full time friend
Lately I swear there's something crawling on my skin
Like anyone worthy I am flattered by your fascination with me
Memories are just where you need them
Don't look at me now
Sick of trying to find a way inside
I just don't care anymore
When the horses come to drag me away
When you're feeling all wrong in the back of your mind again
I need a catalyst to rekindle the flame
One jump ahead of the breadline
Won't you come with me to a place that's real
So lately been wondering who will be there to take my place
No one's picking up the phone
You know it ain't easy for these thoughts to leave me
Wonder how you sleep
We were tight but it falls apart as silver turns to blue
Oh honey, honey, what have you done?
Whenever I'm alone with you
That's just...special :| I don't even know
It Fits, One Way Or Another
Dec. 1st, 2008 08:50 amAnd falling down on your knees asking for sympathy
And being caught in between all you wish for and all you seen
And trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in
May gods love be with you
Always
May gods love be with you
I know I would apologize if I could see your eyes
cause when you showed me myself I became someone else
But I was caught in between all you wish for and all you need
I picture you fast asleep
A nightmare comes
You cant keep awake
May gods love be with you
Always
May gods love be with you
cause if I find
If I find my own way
How much will I find
If I find
If I find my own way
How much will I find
You
I dont know anymore
What its for
I'm not even sure
If there is anyone who is in the sun
Will you help me to understand
cause I been caught in between all I wish for and all I need
Maybe you're not even sure what its for
Any more than me
May gods love be with you
Always
May gods love be with you
And I Hate It, This Riot
Dec. 1st, 2008 12:13 amFor just talking.
It's a little anticlimatic, somehow.
Alexis is one of my more special cousins, that's to be sure
They god we caught that connecting flight.
If we had taken that car trip home, I think I would have killed someone.
Also? After four days of dealing with real life, family drama? Internet drama? I'm just laughing and shaking my head. That's right, I'm lookin' at YOU.
( SEE RESULTS HURRRR )
In other news I think I've talked to my sister more in the past few days then I have...in my whole life. I dunno, it's strange. Things keep being brought up that I don't want to think about. I just want them shoved back in the corner, those nagging thoughts I've had since I found out the truth about my mom. These talks of ours don't help with that.
At least drinking with Wendy, Alexis and Ciarra was alright. Even if I did make everyone awkward with my drunken offensive statement about my aunt's dead baby. Sad thing is? Probably would have said it even if I was sober. I don't know what that says about me.
I got like four hours of sleep again. Sharing a room with that many people and feeling like I can't even get up to piss without pissing five cousins off? Not a good sleep environment. Especially the corner I was shoved in last night. My body is so sore, it's not funny. I just want to go home.
This trip is draining. I need to start memorizing those lines for my class on Monday. Maybe I'll stay behind today. I don't know why, but being around my family for any long period makes me feel so..awkward. I just get tired of all the jabs at the things that interest me, like I really am some kind of...I dunno, freak or something. Just because I prefer comics and anime over shopping. Because I'd usually rather stay in than go out. That I've been lied to for most of my life because everyone sees me as this fragile, breakable fucking thing.
It just brings out the worst in me...this bitterness and jealousy that I just don't like.
Too much thinking about other things as well, but I just..I don't know.
I say bad things when under the influence, but I say them when sober as well.
Yay for being vaguely offensive.
More later. Have a meme
List the first ten series that come to mind.
Your friends will comment with the character from each series that they think you are most like.
REMEMBER THIS IS WHO I'M MOST LIKE, NOT MY FAVORITES.
1. Fruits Basket
2. Saiyuki
3. Heroes
4. Harry Potter
5. Lord of the Rings
6. Bleach
7. Katekeyo Hitman Reborn
8. Tenchi Muyo
9. Outlaw Star
10. Ranma 1/2
I Got Arrested On A Whim
Nov. 28th, 2008 03:09 pmI also got to Harry Potter's Magic Wand :| Ahurhur.
I couldn't believe how many parents took their like...ten year old kids to see that play. Seriously, just because the guy who plays Harry Potter is in it doesn't mean it's kids appropriate. There's a little thing called Google that allows you to research things before you take your children to see them. Some of the ushers were pulling aside parents and explaining to them that it was not a good play for kids, and not just because of the nudity either. It's a psychologically intense play.
I also bought some awesome boots at Macy's :| And saved my cousin from a hyperglycemic attack.
Need to debate some apps and other stuff. Not so sure about some of them. I would really like to find some place to take up Elle though :| I want to play her more than anyone else right now.
Leaving for food soon. Little Italy tonight *^*
And now they want to drag me out to the fucking eleven story Macy's for Black Friday. So much do not want.
At least I get to see Equus later. Hopefully my sick won't keep me from enjoying it.
Edit: wtf Bleach 336. Wtf :|
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Good times, good times.
My grandma is picking me up to take me to the airport at ten in the morning
and I still need to pack
I should do that.
I also cleaned all the trash out of my room today and did all my laundry. Small things, but I feel accomplished nonetheless.
But, Me, I Do As I Please
Nov. 24th, 2008 08:19 pmTomorrow I go to Target to buy a new purse, and clean up a bit, because this room is ridicilous. And pack.
and Wednesday I leave for New York :| Joy.
And dammit Koko, I have no idea what I want D:
For the meantime, have a meme I stole from Sonia
RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes/Windows Media Player/ETC on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5. Put this on your journal.
( Jen Is Bringing The Drugs )
And now it is time to go watch Heroes with Scott :| Fuck yeah.
I don't know why I try to open up to her.
I tried to explain that I don't feel close to most of the family and being stuck in a small house with ten of us for like four days has been making my anxiety run high, but she says I'm just being dramatic.
Maybe I am.
I wish I could explain this apprehension and anxiety in a way that it made sense to people.
I still need to finish that paper. A thousand words left.
This next week is going to be a long one, and I really don't want to go on this trip to New York, but what choice do I have?
I wish I didn't take everything so...much. It seems like I feel everything, good or bad, way too intensely for my own good.
Ignore that. Have a meme instead.
What has surprised you the most about me (if anything) since joining my flist? Was anything completely unexpected or have I always fit the picture of me you have in your head? Post this in your own journal and see how you have surprised people!
ICONS OVER HURRR
Now I go sleep.
EDIT: I lied. I didn't go to bed yet.
However? Pushing Daises getting canceled? Epic fail. :| Figures though.
Okay. Sleep for real.
Also, before that, she took me to the British food store near her *^* I got myself Jaffa Cakes, Digestives and Wine Gums. FUCK YES :| You don't even know how happy this makes me. You don't even know, man.
And then when went to bug her boyfriend at his work (her work too, Stater Bros) I finally found Pomegrante 7-up. I bought some, and it was made of win.
Oh, and we went to a Farmer's Market where I bought Pomegranate Marshmallows.
No, I did not buy anything healthy :||
I'm also convinced that Ophelia is a phantom kitty now, I never see her when I go over to Kelsey's place anymore :| Only Hercules, the attention whore.
Tomorrow, I think I'll try to start that paper +_+
No Other Road, No Other Way
Nov. 20th, 2008 01:08 pmClass went well, then I walked home, rocking out to rent, and in a little bit, I'll be heading out to Orange County to hang out with Kanada and see Urinetown at her school. I'm excited /o/
I like how I switched out four of my icons for characters from Heroes, and they're all of the same two characters. Can you say fangirl? I can.
I think I want to play Elle somewhere, if only I can find a good game that takes non anime characters